Orienting Myself in America

Over the years I’ve lived here in the US, I have experienced my share of awkward moments related to being Japanese/Asian. Even though most of such encounters do not involve 意図的な悪意 (malicious intent), they often puzzle me and leave me with a big “WHY?”

One time, I 耳にした (overheard) a server at a restaurant in a hotel referring to us (I was with other Japanese people) using the word “Oriental”.  I had to gently break it to her that we are not rugs and we preferred to be called “Asian” if for some reason she had to mention our 民族性 (ethnicity). 

On the other side of the spectrum, there are many 過度に熱心な (overenthusiastic) people who want to ask anything and everything about Japan to me, often a token Japanese, starting with “Which Japanese restaurant do you like the best in town?” or “Which did you like better もののけ姫 (‘Princess Mononoke’) or 千と千尋の神隠し (‘Spirited Away’)?” to “Why are Japanese people so polite?” (Just FYI, my answers are “I’m still looking,” “Spirited Away,” and “We can be super impolite if we want to.”)

Something else that happens from time to time is people wanting to introduce me to other Japanese people they know, just because we are both Japanese.  This sometimes ends up being ぎこちない (awkward) for everyone, if I have nothing much in common with the other person other than being Japanese.  

But no worries, I believe it is much better that people are being curious than being 無関心　(indifferent) or even worse, 偏狭 (intolerant).  After all, being among Occidentals is not accidental for this (not) Oriental girl, and being curious is the first step to our intercultural understanding.  Peace✌️