“Magic Phrases” when dealing with Japanese
Articles, Cross-cultural communication, Working with Japanese
In another article on this site, I discussed some phrases that Japanese tend to dislike hearing when they work with non-Japanese. This time, let’s look at some phrases that I find to be especially helpful when working with Japanese. They are so useful in producing the desired effect that they can even be said to be “magic” – like saying “open sesame.”
Advice
Non-Japanese are often frustrated by Japanese colleagues who do not give sufficient direction or opinions. It can feel like pulling teeth to try to get clear guidance from some Japanese. However, I’ve found one phrase that works consistently in encouraging Japanese to be more forthcoming: “What is your advice for me?” Advice is one of those English words that has become a part of the Japanese language, through transliteration into the katakana syllabary. So it’s familiar to all Japanese. And for Japanese, it seems to have the connotation of one’s personal opinion. Thus, by asking a Japanese person for their advice, you are freeing them from having to hew to the party line. This gives them the freedom to say what they feel as an individual, without worrying about whether its in complete agreement with what everyone else in their group thinks. This makes them less reticent, and you get much more detailed information.
Options
Often, Japanese will make requests that are vague. In such cases, it’s tempting to shoot back a question such as “how do you want me to do it” or “what approach would you like me to take?” Clarifying questions such as these are of course better than not asking at all and having things remain vague. But I have found that lobbing back an open-ended question such as this to Japanese does not always result in the most helpful reply. Because if the Japanese person were able to verbalize exactly what they were looking for, its likely that they would have done so in the first place. In such situations, I find that Japanese are often relying on you to add value to the situation by leveraging your expertise in the reply.
The way to do this is to think through the possible ways that the situation can be approached, and list those in your reply. In a way, to give them a multiple-choice list of options that they can choose from. You could say “Here are the three options for how to do this, which do you prefer?”, and then list them out. Your correspondent will then choose one. You will have demonstrated both your helpfulness and your expertise, and you will have gotten a clear answer.
Retransmission
You’ve sent a fax or an email to a Japanese colleague, but have not heard back from them. You want to follow up, but don’t want to seem like you are nagging. In such situations, I’ve found that it’s best to take the same email and resend it, putting “retransmission” or “resending” in the subject line. Depending on how your email software works, you may want to use the “forward” or other function in order to clearly show when the email had been sent in the first place. In the case of a fax, simply write “retransmission” or “resending” on the same exact piece of paper, and just put it through the fax machine again.
Sending the same message with “retransmission” or “resending” is preferable to re-writing your inquiry. Because the person you are corresponding with probably has a large in-box of incoming messages, and if you write something new you force them to spend time deciphering yet another one. (When corresponding with people who are not native speakers of English, it’s important to remember that it’s time-consuming for them to read messages that are written in English.)
The other merit of this method is that it acts as the gentlest of reminders, because it gives the other person the benefit of the doubt that they might not have received your first message. And since faxes and email are not always 100% reliable, there is indeed a chance that the first message had been lost. And even if it wasn’t, handling it this way gives your contact an opportunity to save face.
Different
Disagreeing with Japanese colleagues in a direct way can be damaging to relationships. However, you need to find a way to show that you are not comfortable with a certain idea or course of action. I’ve found that two “magic” words that can connote disagreement without sounding rude to Japanese. One is “different” and the other is “another.” They can be used interchangeably in sentences such as the following:
- That’s an interesting idea but I have a different/another way of looking at it.
- I have a different/other idea.
- I understand your position. But I have some different/other information that I would like you to consider also.
- I see your point. But I have a different/another option that I want to let you know about.
These phrases can be used to politely indicate disagreement, and encourage the other person to consider your ideas without causing them to lose face.
Sorry/prevent
Something has gone wrong, and you want to keep it from damaging your relationship with your Japanese counterpart. Many non-Japanese, particularly Americans, will attempt to “explain away” the problem, by citing the extenuating circumstances. This is meant to show that the problem was not intentionally allowed to happen. However, this approach tends to irritate Japanese further, because it sounds to them like you are making excuses.
A better way to deal with problems is the following two-step approach. The first step is to apologize, using the word “sorry.” This is a word that many non-Japanese, particularly Americans, tend to shy away from, because it connotes taking full blame. However, to Japanese ears, saying that one is sorry does not necessarily mean that one is accepting full legal responsibility for a problem. It more carries the connotation of showing that you care about the other person’s situation. So, one can use phrases such as “I’m sorry this happened” or “I’m sorry that you were inconvenienced.” For many Japanese, the word sorry is extremely important, and if they don’t hear it used in some way when a problem has happened, they will become implacable.
After using the word sorry, it’s important to also use the word prevent. Japanese believe deeply that problems are preventable, so that the same problem should not be allowed to happen again. Lessons should be learned from the current problem to avoid the same thing happening in the future. It’s important to indicate to Japanese that you are working to prevent the problem – otherwise they will remain concerned that it will recur. For this purpose, using phrases such as “Here’s what we plan to do to prevent this from happening again” or “these are the steps we will take to prevent this same problem from re-occurring” is helpful.
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